One learns to live with the loss, the tragedy, the waste, and the gaping hole in the fabric of one's life. There is no closure, nor would I want one. I want to remember him all my life, vividly: his laughter, the smell of his sneakers under his bed, his moments of joy, his humility, and his integrity." |
If you have lost someone to suicide, the first thing you should know is that you are not alone. Each year over 33,000 people in the United States die by suicide -- the devastated family and friends they leave behind are known as "survivors." There are millions of survivors who, like you, are trying to cope with this heartbreaking loss. |
Survivors often experience a wide range of grief reactions, including some or all of the following: |
Shock is a common immediate reaction. You may feel numb or disoriented, and may have trouble concentrating. |
Symptoms of depression, including disturbed sleep, loss of appetite, intense sadness, and lack of energy. |
Anger towards the deceased, another family member, a therapist, or yourself. |
Relief, particularly if the suicide followed a long and difficult mental illness. |
Guilt, including thinking, "If only I had...." |
These feelings usually diminish over time, as you develop your ability to cope and begin to heal. |